What Your Mobile Game Addiction Really Says About You

by Chief Tin | July 3, 2015 | , , ,

Like a pack of astrologists we got our team of writers analyzing what type of people get obsessed on today’s popular mobile games. These are as accurate as horoscopes, which should mean they’re 100% true.

1.) Temple Run
Temple Run mobile game

Running away from problems pretty much already feels like this.

You’re running away from something irl. Not a pack of subhuman gorillas but probably something that feels as menacing.

2.) Candy Crush
Candy Crush mobile game

Level of sweetness in game is directly disproportional to levels in real life.

You’re craving for that long awaited perfect match in real life but for some reason all you keep getting is the human equivalent of stupid black licorice that masquerades as something nice and sweet but only gives you cavities in the end.

3.) Cut The Rope
Pull the Rope mobile game

Sometimes you gotta cut the right ties to get to what you want.

You have difficulties cutting off ties that not only DON’T help but also harm you. You’re an enabler who would hang onto people even if it’s toxic for you.

4.) Clash of Clans
Clash of Clans mobile game

Even your troll bases are a work of flawless art

You’re always the overachiever trying to achieve the perfect 3-star, even in real life. 2 stars hell no, what is this, amateur hour?

5.) Dinner Dash
Diner Dash mobile game

You have an innate sense of wanting to serve. Especially wanting to serve pairs of identical twins.

Bonafide people pleaser. A lot of times you let people walk all over you, but unlike Flo in Diner Dash when people around you work you to the bone, you don’t get paid enough.

6.) Plants vs Zombies
Plants Vs Zombies mobile game

What if those zombies are just hungry vegans? It’s okay, we can’t tell the difference either.

Anxious and might be a little bit antisocial. You talk to plants. Not that it’s a bad thing. You have a tendency to micromanage.

7.) Game of War: Fire Age
Game of War: Fire Age mobile game

Shown above: The premise of the entire Game of War: Fire Age.

You like boobs and Kate Upton, specifically Kate Upton’s boobs. Not much else.

8.) Crossy Road
Crossy Road mobile game

The chicken crossed roads. Crossed.

There are a lot of things you wish you would have done in life, but chickened out at the last minute. You feel like life is unrelenting and tiring, and right now don’t know where you are headed in life.

Slotomania mobile game

You win some, you lose some. In your case you probably don’t know why that happens.

You’re probably broke in real life. Also you’re still wondering what pulling the slot machine lever does.

10.) Cookie Jam
Cookie Jam mobile game

Shown above: Panda who has just found out that the cake is a lie.

You have an ungodly love of sugar. You get easily distracted by blinking lights and shiny things.

11.) SimCity BuildIt
SimCity Build It mobile game

Now you can build skyscrapers like Donald Trump, but without the hatred for Mexicans.

You’re a bit of a control freak, but really, all you want is for everyone to prosper. Mostly you, but still.

Chief Tin

Chieftin likes beaches. All kinds of beaches. She loves the rogue-class and doesn't understand why anyone would want to control a moving boulder a.k.a anything in warrior-class. She is currently pursuing further studies in creative writing and pursuing even more vigorously what to do with creative writing.

All views and opinions are strictly that of the author's.

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